When Love Hurts

"Help, I can't tell if we're ending

Until we break down, say it now, we're through
All you do

When love hurts, baby
Yeah, that's how you know it's real
When love hurts, yeah that's how it
Yeah that's how you know
When love hurts, baby
Yeah, that's how you know it's real
When love hurts, yeah that's how it
Yeah that's how you know it's real"

When Love Hurts - JoJo


This week's theme is comebacks. I blogged on Sunday about the return of Michael Murphy to the music scene, and now I want to draw your attention to a second major music comeback in the last couple of weeks. This girl was on top before Ariana Grande, before Lorde, even before Taylor Swift.

Everyone, JoJo is back.

Oh yes, you remember JoJo. That fourteen year old who topped the charts in 2004 with the smash hit Leave (Get Out). This was the teenage angst song which girls sung their hearts out to, because how could that guy be so stupid to leave his number on his phone. JoJo followed up with a second smash hit Too Little Too Late in 2006, where she brought them feels about another silly boy breaking her heart. Add in her acting chops in Aquamarine and R.V. and we've got a girl who ruled the mid 2000's.

Unfortunately, JoJo then got locked in a legal battle over her recording contract and disappeared off the music scene for a while. I was gutted for her, because I would have loved to hear her music as she grew out of her teenage years and into a young adult. I imagine she would have captured growing up perfectly in her own angsty way. But never fear, because JoJo is free from her recording contract and back with some sweet tunes.

She released a "tringle" which seems to be an EP of three singles. And if there is one person you can trust to make great music, it is JoJo. She uploaded her description of her three songs onto Spotify and what stood out to me was her comments about how being away from music nearly broke her. But she goes on to say how she knew it was something worth fighting for because she was incredibly passionate about it. I'd encourage you to jump onto Spotify and listen to her words and thoughts about recording this "tringle".

But let's be honest, three songs aren't enough to satisfy me. These Wikipedia rumours better be true in saying this is a preview of a third studio album, because JoJo has got ten years of music to give us. And I can't wait.

Not Afraid To Die

“I’ll be the loaded gun

The only one that I will ever need

And when my time is done

The battle’s won

Will you remember me?

We’ll write it cross the sky

Won’t look back and say goodbye

This is a battle cry

I’m not afraid to die”

Not Afraid To Die – Written By Wolves

Bear with me here because I am about to say something I’ve said many times before. But this time I think I’m right - more right than I’ve ever been before.

People, the next big thing in New Zealand rock music has been found.

It started with my bestie Zee suggesting we go to a gig at the Kings Arms last week. It was a free gig and as Zee was trying Austere August and the Kings Arms is my favourite venue for gigs it was perfect for us. I hadn’t placed much expectation on the gig as it was one of the first for Written By Wolves. And the lead singer was Michael Murphy. Yes, that Michael Murphy. Michael Murphy of the hit TV show NZ Idol. Michael Murphy who performs covers at Christmas in the Park every year. And now, Michael Murphy trying to bring himself back by forming and fronting Written By Wolves.

Well, forget your preconceptions about this man because Written By Wolves aren’t trying to make it, they’re going to make it. Never before have I seen a band that captivated me within seconds. I couldn’t tell it was their first major gig because this was a slick performance, from vocals to guitars to mixing to the all important on stage banter between songs. Written By Wolves are backed by many years experience in the music industry; Michael Murphy has been on the scene for more than ten years and the other three got starts in bands such as Shotgun Alley, False Start and Hurricane Kids. They know how to play, how to entertain, and how to write songs that will propel their name.

Watch this space. Written By Wolves will be the reinvention story of the year. These guys have taken everything they know about music, they’ve grown up from their past music industry selves and they are ready to deliver some killer tracks. I’ll see you at the next gig.

I Can Change

"And if you're looking for change

I'll be what you're looking for

Even if it's not who I am

I can change
I can change for you

I can bend
I can break
I can shift
I can shake
Place the trail through the drive of rain
Girl I can change for you"

I Can Change - Brandon Flowers

Let me first acknowledge the fact this song has an amazing sound. It's cool, it's edgy, it's the guy from The Killers telling us how hip he is. I first heard Brandon Flowers singing I Can Change live on The Graham Norton Show and I thought it was well on its way to being the hit of the European summer. But oh how these lyrics about changing for this girl really grind my gears. 

Sometimes new relationships can cure our flaws. I've heard of laziness, drinking problems and smoking habits disappearing and being replaced with exercise and nourishing hobbies with the help of new partners. And if this is what Brandon Flowers meant by he can change, then sure, go for it. Let your new bae guide you to a healthier place. 

Fundamentally changing who you are for someone else, however, is what I have a problem with. I watched someone I know go through five boyfriends and she went from an army chick to an emo to a bogan motorbike riding lass to a tea obsessed hipster to, currently, a vegan. Each boyfriend she adopted a new personality and I think she's never found out who she really is. 

I couldn't imagine changing who I am for a man. I have my passions, my hobbies and my favourites, and these make up who I am. And if I was to start morphing into someone else, would that man still love me? After all, he's the one who fell for the crazy, chocolate loving, cricket obsessed, musically minded, wannabe traveller, dinosaur hunting girl. Imagine if he wanted me to give up this blog - madness!

So let this song - this fantastically sounding but lyrically frustrating song - be a tune to take with a grain of salt. Because you - you are quite great, and you shouldn't have to change that for anyone. 

Unpretty

"You can buy your hair if it won't grow
You can fix your nose if he says so

You can buy all the make up that M.A.C. can make

But if you can't look inside you
Find out who am I too
Be in the position to make me feel so
Damn unpretty
I'll make you feel unpretty too"

Unpretty - TLC

Last year, during the four months when I more or less ran away from New Zealand, I spent some time with my aunt and uncle in Queensland. It was a strange meeting of sorts - we had been distant for many years as a result of busy schedules and a large body of water between us. We reconnected a few years ago and I thought I would pop in during my travels around Australia. Well, a 'pop in' quickly turned into slumming it on their air mattress for three weeks and doing nothing useful while I killed time before flying onto my next destination. While I was there I did manage to learn a few things - how to cook some stuff, how to look after chickens, how people in Queensland go about their business and how many triple chocolate biscuits I can eat before I start to feel sick. 

On a more serious note, my aunt - who is the biggest free spirit I have ever met - took me through joyful learning experiences, because that's what she is good at doing. We talked about how to bring joy into your life and how to get rid of pesky things like worry and stress. There was one thing she said and it has stuck with me since: to help her bring more joy she treats her mind like another person. At first I thought that was quite a strange concept, but then I thought some more and realised what she was getting at.

It's about respecting your mind, and therefore, yourself. When you think bad thoughts about yourself and about your life, you are allowing negativity in. As TLC say, you could look in the mirror and think that you are damn unpretty. But here's the kicker: you would never look at your friend and say "damn you're unpretty". We spend so much time pouring compliments onto other people that we forget about ourselves or worse, we don't think we deserve the same kindness.

So be a bit nicer to yourself. Treat yourself how you would treat other people. Don't call yourself unpretty. Kick your nasty habits that don't do you any good. It's like our good friends TLC say - you can change your outside all you want but you still need to look inside you and find your inner prettiness.

Haven't Met You Yet

"I might have to wait, I'll never give up
I guess it's half timing and the other half's luck
Wherever you are, whenever it's right
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life

And I know that we can be so amazing
And baby your love is gonna change me
And now I can see every possibility

Somehow I know that it’ll all turn out
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out
And promise you kid I'll give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet"

Haven't Met You Yet - Michael Buble 

A few days ago I was in the car with my friend, on our way to the Coromandel for the weekend, when we started talking about the perfect partners for our each of our friends. We had fun coming up with different qualities a partner must have and what they could bring to our group of friends. And then my friend turned to me and said "and what about you?" 

Oh, how this got me thinking. We live in a world where meeting someone and dating is literally at your finger tips - or, more accurately, a right swipe away. I've given Tinder a go but never went on any dates because, well, I got over the app pretty quickly. The last use my Tinder account got was when my friends got ahold of it and went on a swipe right spree, resulting in a lot of matches and zero conversations on my behalf. I'm sorry, boys of Tauranga, that was my gay friend who was deciding for me. 

My mother says I'm picky, my mates from school say I get bored easily and my bestie said I deserve someone special. They're all correct on some levels. I have a short list of qualities I want in a man but they're nothing extreme - I'm not going to demand he speaks eight languages and cooks me Italian food every night. Of course I want to be entertained in lots of different ways but I'm also sure I could get accustomed to the routine, everyday life of relationships. And hell yeah, I deserve someone special. 

Eventually, I turned back to my friend and said something like "I'm quite certain that one day I will meet the perfect man and that will be it. Until then I won't bother stressing out about it." 

And this is true. Sure, I've met a lot of guys over the years and I haven't yet found one worth keeping around, but this doesn't get me down. I don't sit at home waiting for Prince Charming to turn up on my doorstep.  I get out and about; I go out with friends, I travel to new cities and I go on living my single life. 

And I will keep doing this until I have my Michael Buble moment and meet the perfect man. Maybe he'll be a complete stranger. Maybe he'll be someone I've known for a long time but suddenly see in a new light. Maybe I'll find him in my hometown or maybe we will meet in a foreign land. Maybe he'll be Corey Anderson. Whoever he is, he'll come, and I'll give it all I've got. 

Fight Song

"This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me"

Fight Song - Rachel Platten 

If this song isn't your current tune then you have got to get on board the Fight Song train. This is the latest song to throw a big middle finger up to those people who don't believe in you. Last year we got our groove on thanks to Shake It Off. This year it's all about Fight Song. 

At first listen it seems cheesy and cliche, like something someone else has done before. And yeah, this song is all those things. Then you realise that your own life is cheesy, cliche, and someone has already done everything you are trying to do. But you don't really care, because finally, really truly finally, you realise you don't have to give a toss what other people think about you. Or at least, that's what happened to me. 

I have spent the last six years building towards this moment. Through overseas trips, going through university and making my way into the professional workplace, through gaining new friends and getting rid of poisonous relationships, through learning, growing, making mistakes and taking chances, I've come to the moment where I am thoroughly my own person. 

And, as I really, truly, definitely started to believe that, I heard Fight Song. 

It was the anchor I needed, the song that made me think and feel that what I was doing was right. Because, although I don't quite know what I'm fighting for just yet, I know that I can do that fighting. 

And the clincher?

That one line: I don't really care if nobody else believes. 

Because, at the end of the day, you really are the only person who can fight for yourself. 

And don't forget to get on iTunes and buy The X Factor New Zealand's version of Fight Song - profits go to Ronald McDonald House

Not Gonna Die

"The last thing I heard was you whispering goodbye
And then I heard you flat line

No, not gonna die tonight
We're gonna stand and fight forever
(Don’t close your eyes)
No, not gonna die tonight
We're gonna fight for us together
No, we’re not gonna die tonight"


Not Gonna Die - Skillet 

There has been a thought bothering me for the past six or so weeks. I am a big fan of The X Factor NZ and this season I have thoroughly enjoyed watching and scrutinising the acts. And, just like me, most of my Twitter feed has been doing the same thing. Mostly I see positive comments about the contestants, and any negativity I can scroll past. But there was one on-going topic that bugged me, and that was the constant Christian bashing of Fare Thee Well. I loved the group, but I am more than willing to accept they are not everyone's cup of tea. However, I am not okay with comments that recommend Christian acts like them return to their little cults, because this world could learn a lot from Christian music. 

My own beliefs in Christianity are something I refuse to discuss with anyone. I have, for the past five years or so, been perfectly content with the way I think and believe in Christianity. I can't explain it but I take what I need from Christianity. 

And I love the music; I will listen to Christian music without hesitation. When I first found Skillet - in my opinion the best Christian rock band - I had no issues with their association with Christianity. And I have no doubt that Skillet and their songs kept my life on track. I first heard Skillet when I was a teenager, someone who was a lot more unsure of myself than I am now. They were a mix of the angry rock I needed to rage to and the positive words I needed to keep myself going. Their lyrics sing about not giving up, how relationships have saved their lives and how they will not let a world full of evil consume them. They take a stand - a stand to make the world a better place. 

It is this kind of positivity that flows through into all types of Christian associated artists. Switchfoot, Rapture Ruckus, Hillsong United are all known for telling us how we can make our lives the best they can be. And it isn't a case of shoving stories about Jesus down our throats, it's about using the beliefs and teaching of Christianity to help us be better people. 

I'm glad we had Fare Thee Well on this season of The X Factor New Zealand. Sure, they didn't win, but for a few weeks we had three of this country's most beautiful people on our television screens. They radiated positivity. And they reminded us that sometimes our music simply needs to be about seeing the good in the world. 

THESE GUYS: